My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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