i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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