College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
