You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
