Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
