you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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