we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
