We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize