it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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