i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
