listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
