I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
