just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
then he tried to convert me to islam
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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