If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
