dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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