the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize