I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
