Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
