Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She needs sedatives and a leash
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I am available for nakedness
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
