The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
