Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Randomize
