Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize