Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
