yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
