dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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