Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i need to put some appletini on your dick
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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