im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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