it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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