My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
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