I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
