you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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