ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
