Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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