I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
