You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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