so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize