But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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