he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize