I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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