I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'm just crazy horny about you
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Randomize
