Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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