I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
