i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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