I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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