It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
