What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
