I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
