Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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