Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
