New low: just hacked my moms facebook
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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