You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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